theovarianbarbarian:

my skills include hesitating, missing opportunities, and being full of regret

forever

(Source: m-ve)

eno ┋┋ 「☂」

xdearopheliax:

lady-chyna:

I have to remember this

I feel like I need to remember this. 

(Source: seifukucat)

misterpornographic:

overaaalls:

when i look at myself in the mirror i feel like one of those really detailed spongebob paintings

me too

(Source: battasenpai)

donutlikeu:

scraggay:

slam nunk

the score is 6 to nun 

(Source: k1x)

zackisontumblr:

if you ever have children you could introduce them to people by saying hey wanna see what i made

oh-woah-dope:

since this is yahoo, can someone help me please?

i held a girl’s hand the other day and she didn’t come to school for like a week. did i made her pregnant?

teenytigress:

SO THIS GUY IN MY ENGLISH IS DOING A PROJECT FOR BIO WHERE HE GETS A DUCKLING TO IMPRINT ON HIM SO HE JUST CARRIES IT AROUND WITH HIM TO ALL OF HIS CLASSES AND I SWEAR THIS DUCK IS THE MOST WELL BEHAVED FUCKING POULTRY IVE EVER SEEN IT JUST SITS ON HIS DESK QUIETLY AND SOMETIMES HE PUTS IT IN HIS POCKET AND IT JUST SLEEPS LIKE WOW YOU GO DUCKY

thecouscousqueen:

she’s right

(Source: doitsustuck)

goddammitfenton:

if you ever feel bad about yourself, just remember this one time in my english class, we were writing horror stories and one of the girls wrote “it was friday the 13th, the night before halloween” for her opening sentence